To The Empty Seat – Forgiveness

April 12, 2011 — 1 Comment

Don’t think I’m crazy. Even though you may have reason to. Not to long ago I sat in my car talking to the person in the empty passenger seat. The reason why is because this was a person who has taken an exit from my life.

Sometimes you do someone wrong. Sometimes, someone does you wrong. So what do you do when you’re done wrong?

I think I usually posture myself against thy person and act like they are just not that big of a deal to me. After all, they are missing out. Sometimes, I dismiss their wrong by pretending they just didn’t mean that much to me. Sometimes, I even believe myself on that. In reality though, I know I don’t believe that.

When there is love in your heart for another, and the momentum of that love is stopped by avoidance, rejection, or harsh treatment, a wound is in inflicted. I don’t think we have a natural way to quickly surpass the wound. Our smiles betray us. We want to act like we are ok, but we were created for love, not it’s absence. So the infliction of the absence of love, whatever that may be, sends us reeling. It stings. It hurts. It feels like a bit of our souls has a gash that may never heal.

So I was sitting in my car talking to the person in the empty passenger seat. Then I finally said it. The three honest words my soul had ben waiting to speak.

“You hurt me.”

I wanted to posture, swagger, act like it wasn’t a big deal, but deep down I needed to simply say,

“You hurt me.”

Honesty is pivotal. Embracing the truth allows me to move forward. So that my life doesn’t remain static in bitterness.

The words are tough to say, because they five power away. Those words say to a person that we genuinely care about them.

“You hurt me.”

Then I can even say what my soul craves even more. Words that are in me, that I don’t have to search for because they are as constant as oxygen. Three bold words.

“I love you.”

That is why I am sharing this with you. Because I care. Although how I love you may change, I love you nonetheless. I don’t want to say those words because they show too much that I care. I have to share those words because if I don’t, I’ll only be half of who I am.

“I love you.”

Those words let me say what I don’t believe I can say. I want to say these words to you, but saying these words makes me go straight into the middle of the wound you inflicted. Not just for a moment. I have to live in the pain again, but live by this love, not by my reaction to your infliction. The words I want to share, but I don’t want to share. These words say we’re not over. These words say something “it’s ok” “no worries” or “oh it is fine” just don’t get to.

These are the words of hoping. The words that open the door of trusting again. The words of loving. Three healing words.

“I forgive you.”

Sometimes you can say those words to a person. Sometimes, you only can say them to the person who has left your life. So you say them to the person who is no longer sitting in the passenger seat. The seat may be empty, but it is full of potential. These words change everything.

“I forgive you.”

Because I won’t be defined by your defiance, but by the Divine’s deep love for me.

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One response to To The Empty Seat – Forgiveness

  1. 

    this blog is what I need today. I am going through exactly the same way you have described, only the three words “I forgive you” still hard to say. Not there yet. Maybe I need to talk to an empty passenger’s seat for my therapy.

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